Job Searching

It's become a new way of greeting me. The traditional hello, how are you? now has a comma where the question mark used to be, and an additional question. And no, it's not about my health. The new way of greeting is this:

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Hi, how are you, how's the job search?

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Now, if the job search was going well, don't you think I would have a job? Or told you as soon as I saw you? Or maybe even posted it on the fantastic sites designed for sharing information about my life?

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I can assure you, as soon as I find myself a job that does not entail me selling hot and cold beverages to over caffeinated people I will let you know.

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The people of my apartment community believe I am a teacher, because they see me at the pool all summer and then I disappear about this time every year.

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As much as I admire teachers, and all they do, I do not have the patience to teach children. There is a good possibility I would be the teacher throwing things at her students, not markers, but large things, like desks.

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Could you see the school supply list I would have to send out? Right there under markers and crayons, helmets and shoulder pads would be included. Yeah...

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Right, so now that you are all petrified I will go on an abusive rampage through schools, and are contacting everywhere you can think of to keep me from teaching children, I'm here to tell you that is not part of my "Get a Job Plan."

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Yes, I have a plan. A friend of mine, who is more spontaneous than I am, is constantly telling me I should have a plan. I should have a plan when I write, and as I'm job searching, and I feel like I should have one for going through life.

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I don't have a life plan. If you know my parents you are probably shocked since they plan for everything, including time for being spontaneous. It's not their fault, one is an engineer, and the other is a nurse, planning comes naturally to them.

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So what am I hoping to do with my very expensive college education?

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Well, my first plan was to rent out a plan that writes in the sky: "Mo needs a job!" Complete with exclamation point. But that's not all that practical. My next idea is to walk up and down the street with a sandwich board declaring I'm available for hire, but that just leads to really bad things.

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As I cause you to panic for the second time in four paragraphs, I assure you I'm joking. Maybe.

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I have contacted academic advisors at universities about going back to school, because if I can't find anything in my field, then I might as well grab a degree in something useful.

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Small problem. Everything useful, here in Seattle, is everything I struggle with. Computers? My knowledge of a computer ends after I hit the power button, the hammer hits the hamster that lives inside, the hamster jumps on a treadmill, and powers my computer up.

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My husband just died inside.

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I'm also not great with engineering, as long as whatever it is works when I need it to, I am a happy camper. I never had the urge when I was little to build a robot, or learn how to make packaging material. That doesn't seem like fun. And life needs to be fun, right down to the boring details.

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In all seriousness, I am sending out resumes, and CVs, and calling people at different agencies to see if they are hiring, or if they have received my resume. What have I learned? People are crabby. It's very sad.

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Luckily the snow is about to fall, and the ski industry will be hiring. I'm okay being a ski bum for another year. It's kind of nice being paid in lift tickets and beer.