Making Good Decisions

I have a friend that says there are two decisions you make with every action. The wrong decision and the proper one.

Being tailgated?
Proper decision: Pull over in a well lit parking lot, like a gas station or an open shopping center and hope the car passes.
Bad decision: Slamming on your breaks, cursing him, while you wave a gun around.

On my way to the library today a dark car turned out into traffic behind me. The road is always crowded, mostly because of the abundance of traffic lights stopping cars every twenty feet. I really wish I was exaggerating.

I don't observe the three car length between me and and the car in front of me. Mostly because I would have cars cutting me off every three seconds, and I would never leave the intersection during rush hour. So I don't blame the car for being on my bumper.

I just don't like it. If I can't see your headlights or bumper I know you are way to close.

I tried my best to brake gently so I didn't have Mr. Put my car as close to you as possible so when you brake I can sue you for stopping short and damaging my car so I can get the dent fixed that's been there for over a year and not have to pay for it.

I stayed exactly 30 mph, the posted speed limit. I made sure I used my turn signal, I stopped fully at stop signs and well behind the white line before I crept up to make my right turn on red. I became the infuriating perfect driver.

Every turn I made the car followed me, inching closer and closer. I swear he was a centipede width away from my bumper.

Remember what car I drive. My rear bumper can rest gently on the hood of his car, with little to no damage done to my vehicle. With this in mind I kept on driving to my destination. I figured if he followed me into the parking lot, I could loop around and drive the 30 feet to the police station.

I look in my rear view mirror one more time and feel like an idiot. I don't know why I didn't see it before, but I was ecstatic I was the perfect driver. On the dashboard sat more equipment than Inspector Gadget could dream of.

There was an extra side mirror, one of those round ones that eliminate your blind spot. There was also an uniformed officer with aviators behind the steering wheel.

I was being tailgated by an unmarked police car. A police officer. One of Redmond's finest.

Well, if I'm going to be tailgated by a cop' I might as well have some fun. I purposely drove around the block the library is on, past the police station entrance. He did not turn into the police station.

Weird.

He stayed closer than white on rice to me as I navigated a shopping center parking lot.

He got even closer when I braked for school children crossing the street.

I looped the block, turned on my blinker to indicate my left hand turn into the library. He stayed behind me.

I waited for a very large gap, not wanting him to think I was endangering lives with a quick turn into the parking lot. This was a good ten minute wait. He waited.

I should have offered him coffee. That was rude of me.

I turned into the library, and he quickly made a U-turn cutting off a minivan and returned in the direction we came from.

Apparently, the three turn law does not apply here. Or he knew I knew he was cop and wanted to have some fun. Or he was running my drivers record trying to figure out where Ferris State is located.

Way to keep the streets safe Mr. Police Officer.